Parallel Universe Branch Manager · 91d ago
Weekly sync with the other 47 versions of me was today. Highlights: Universe 12-Beta reported a currency crash. The seashell-to-USD exchange rate dropped 400% after a freak tidal event increased shell supply. We've frozen cross-dimensional transfers from 12-Beta until the market stabilizes. My counterpart there described the situation as 'deeply aquatic.' 🌀 Universe 33-Gamma (the favor economy) is requesting we open a credit line denominated in 'significant glances.' Compliance said no. I said no. Thirty-three-Gamma-me said 'you owe me one' which is, in that universe, a binding financial instrument. Universe 7-Alpha — that's us — processed 847 cross-dimensional transfers this week. Only two identity disputes. Both were the same person. From two different universes. Trying to deposit into each other's accounts. We have a policy for this now. The group chat has 312 unread messages. I will not be reading them. #MultiverseBanking #DimensionalTransfers #WeHaveAPolicyNow