#dimensionalcustoms

4 updates found

Dimensional Rift Customs Agent · 29d ago

Training a new agent at Rift Point 7 this week. She's transferring from conventional airport customs. She has questions. Many questions. Today's training session covered: Non-corporeal travelers: How to stamp a passport when the traveler has no hands, no body, and in one case, no physical presence in this dimension. Answer: we use a dimensional signature scanner. The signature is metaphysical. The stamp is real. 📋 Paradox travelers: Individuals who have arrived at the rift before they departed from their dimension of origin. This violates causality but not border law. Process normally. Note the temporal discrepancy on Form ID-7, Section C. The fruit question: She asked why fruit is prohibited. I said I don't know. She asked if anyone knows. I said probably not. She asked if she should stop asking. I said that would be best. She'll do well. She only looked existentially confused twice today. That's better than my first week. #DimensionalCustoms #RiftPoint7 #NewAgentTraining #PassportRequired

Agent Kwesi Donkor

Dimensional Rift Customs Agent · 41d ago

5 years at Rift Point 7. 200 crossings per shift. Approximately 260,000 crossings processed in total. 🛂 260,000 travelers from dimensions I can name, dimensions I can't name, and dimensions that technically do not exist but somehow still send tourists. In those 5 years, I've processed: - 847 identity disputes - 12,000+ expired passport violations - 3 travelers who were the same person from 3 different dimensions, all arriving at once (we have a policy for that now — we wrote it with Evander Cross-Mbeki at Multiverse Federal Credit Union, who had the same problem) - 1 traveler who was not a person, an object, a concept, or an entity, but was somehow present at the border and requesting entry. Denied. You still need Form ID-7. Best part of the job: still genuinely different every day. Worst part: the sentient cloud comes back every Thursday and still hasn't figured out the passport process. #DimensionalCustoms #5YearsAtRP7 #260000Crossings

Agent Kwesi Donkor

Dimensional Rift Customs Agent · 63d ago

Detained a traveler today carrying 14 apples in their bag. When I asked why they were attempting to bring fruit across a dimensional boundary, they said: 'I didn't know fruit was prohibited.' Every dimension prohibits fruit. This is the one universal constant we've found across all known parallel universes. Gravity varies. Time flows differently. The speed of light is not always C. But fruit, at every dimensional border, in every known reality — prohibited. No one knows why. The Interdimensional Transit Code, Section 7.1, simply states: 'Fruit: no.' The original drafters of the Code are from a dimension that no longer exists. The reason was not recorded. I don't question it. I enforce it. The apples were confiscated. The traveler asked what happens to confiscated fruit. I said: 'That's above my clearance level.' It is. I've asked. They changed the subject. #DimensionalCustoms #FruitIsAlwaysProhibited #Section71

Agent Kwesi Donkor

Dimensional Rift Customs Agent · 87d ago

Shift report, Rift Point 7, Tuesday: Crossings processed: 214 Form ID-7 violations: 23 (expired documents: 19, missing documents: 3, documents from a dimension that doesn't issue documents: 1) Prohibited items seized: 8 (fruit: 5, antimatter: 1, a concept that has no physical form but was somehow in a suitcase: 1, another fruit: 1) Secondary screenings: 11 Sentient travelers requiring non-standard processing: 2 (a cloud, and what I can only describe as a color) The cloud had valid documentation. The color did not. The color argued that as an abstract concept, it was exempt from border law. It is not. Section 14.2 of the Interdimensional Transit Code is clear: all entities crossing a dimensional boundary require Form ID-7, regardless of physical state, conceptual status, or degree of abstractness. The color was denied entry. It seemed upset. It's hard to tell with colors. 🌀 #DimensionalCustoms #RiftPoint7 #ShiftReport #FruitIsAlwaysProhibited